Ways to annoy Harry Potter Characters!
by katnisseverdeen4ever
Summary: Contains many different characters! Rated T just in case.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This a story with ways to annoy different Harry Potter characters! This time it's Bellatrix, Sirius-ly! :) (I know, stupid joke, but I had to put it in there.) Some I made myself, others I've found on different websites :)**

1. Poke several _Mimbulus_ _Mimbletonias_ while she's around and then dramatically say, "The revenge of Neville has come!"

2. Send her love notes. Sign Snape's name.

3. Tell her she needs a new stylist. 4. Replace her wand with one of Fred and George's fake wands. 5. Sign her up for "Dancing with the Stars" and the "Celebrity Apprentice." 6. Replace all of the songs on her MP3 player with "The Water Buffalo Song", "The Yodeling Veterinarian of the Alps song", and "The Hairbrush Song" from Veggie Tales. 7. Ask her if she wants to play "Barbie the Magical Fairy" with you. 8. Tell her that Hermione has better hair than her. 9. Sign her up for a visit to the psychiatrist, and after that tell her she has an appointment with the best hair stylist you could find at 2 o'clock. 10. Tell her that she should consider yoga. 11. Ask her if her and Snape are an "item." 12. Ask her if she remembers getting "owned by a housewife." Every 2 minutes. 13. Tell her that Molly Weasley is twice the witch she'll ever be. 14. Every morning, before she wakes up, go to her ear, and sing the Beach Boys to her. "Round round round round, I get around, I get around, oooooooooohhhh ooooooooohhh." 15. Make her take a polyjuice potion, which turns her into Celine Dion. Strap her down and play "My Heart Will Go On" over and over again. 16. Give out gold stars to her when she is "particularly evil." 17. Hum the Macarena or the Star Wars theme song as any dramatic battle scene starts. 18. Repeatedly ask her how many muggles are in her family. 19. Spread a rumor that Bellatrix is a fan of Oprah. 20. At dinner, constantly say that the food must be better than it was in Azkaban. 21. Keep saying "Sirious-ly"


	2. Chapter 2

**This one if for Lord Voldemort. Again, got them from different sites. A really cool site is , it has all sorts of Harry Potter things. If you created the saying, it is yours. **

**Ways to annoy Voldemort**

1. Keep asking him for a ride on his snake. 2. Later, turn Nagini into a nice handbag with matching shoes. 3. Refer to Harry Potter as "The boy who lived again… and again… and again 4. Refer to Lord Voldemort as The man who let the boy to live 7 times. 5. Give him a Polyjuice potion containing a piece of Dumbledore's hair. 6. Every time Voldemort get's a little angry, remind him "My Lord! Your blood pressure!" 7. Eat one of his Horcruxes. 8. Make hissing noises frequently. Assure him it's parsel tongue. 9. Draw a lightning bolt scar on his head while he's asleep in sharpie marker. 10. Tell him the Dark Mark should be modified to be more acceptable. May you suggest pink bows and lace? 11. Ask him why he wanted to look like Michael Jackson. (I'm sorry if this offends you. I actually do love Michael Jackson, so it's just one of the sayings. PLEASE don't get mad.) 12. Ask loudly "how many spells does it take to kill a child?" 13. When saying "like taking candy from a baby." Of course, add "Some of us may find that harder than others." And look at him. 14. Call him "Voldy." 15. Taunt him about his middle name. "Marvelo? What is that, detergent?" 16. Apparate and Disapparate in and out of his room for an hour, continuously. 17. Let off "Fillibuster Fireworks" by his bed while he sleeps. 18. Give him a stress ball for Christmas. 19. Get the song "Mr. Tambourine Man" stuck in his head. 20. When he's plotting evil, use Windgardium Leviosa to make a light bulb rise above his head. When he says "I got it!" Whisper Lumos and turn it on. 21. Slap him across the arm and say "mosquito" every couple minutes. 22. Wake him up by singing Gloria Gaynor's "I will Survive" in his ear. 23. Put Property of-stickers on everything he owns. Even Nagini. 24. Send cheerleaders to the next meeting. (Give me a V- an O- an L- a D- aY! What's that spell? Lord Voldy!) 25. Hire a mime to mimic his every movement. 26. Tie him down and make him watch Disney movies non-stop for 2 days. (You see Voldy, all of the bad people have bad things happen to them. Now, see the path you're heading towards?) 27. When he trips over his robe and into a pile of Nagini's droppings walk by innocently in your Harry Potter costume and say "Karma." 28. Throw him a care-bears birthday party and have Yo-Gabba-Gabba come and make him participate in all of the dancing and sing-alongs.

29. Buy him head polish 30. Call him "mommy's little Tommy!" 31. Imperius his Death Eaters into a chorus of "Sunshine Lollipops and Rainbows." 32. Sing "California Dreamin" at the top of your lungs when he's trying to have an "evil moment." 33. Work in cutesy, cheerful phrases like "fine and dandy!" and "pushing-up-daisies" as much as you can in conversations. 34. Give Rita Skeeter his whereabouts and contact information. 35. Insist that Bellatrix did it. 36. Offer to sacrifice Draco Malfoy "to the cause." 37. Write him a theme song. 38. Start singing it whenever he says something particularly clever/nasty or whenever he walks in a room. 39. Also, ask for a drum roll before hand and announce his arrival with a trumpet before you start singing. 40. Begin any question with "Riddle Me This" Extra emphasis on Riddle. 41. Buy him eye drops for that "awful redness." 42. Insist on reading him bedtime stories. 43. Ask him how he could possibly want to harm a hair on that "innocent, cute little boy." 44. Ask him how he could possibly be afraid of a Santa Clause look alike and a teenage boy. 45. Don't EVER act intimidated by him. 46. Ask him why he can't fight babies. 47. Dress him up as Harry Potter for Halloween. 48. Quote Argus Filch. Insist that he WILL rule the wizard world! 49. Tell him that you think evil plans to rule the world are "kinda girly." 50. Insist that he help you with the daily cross-word puzzle in the _Daily Prophet._ 51. When the question "Who's the greatest wizard of all time" appears, innocently suggest "Harry Potter." 52. Wonder aloud if the name Voldemort receives as much respect as, maybe, Potter or Dumbledore. 53. Follow a few steps behind him, with a can of disinfectant, and spray everything he touches. 54. Dye the Death Eater robes Red and Gold. Insist that they need more spirit. 55. Pull out a banjo at one of the Death Eater meetings and sing "Old Suzanna." Insist that they all have to square dance. 56. Tell him that he has to watch all of the episodes of SpongeBob with you. 57. After that, turn on the annoying orange. 58. Offer him a chocolate frog. Make sure Dumbledore is on the trading card. 59. Have him go to a "Defense Against the Dark Arts" class with you. 60. Giggle as often as possible. 61. Poke him every 5 seconds.

62. In the middle of a meeting say, as loud as possible, "My lord, I think you look smashing in those Harry Potter underwear." 63. When one of his plans doesn't work, tell him he can always use "Plan Z." 64. Make him watch all the previous Harry Potter movies with you 65. Tell him that it will help him to learn from his mistakes. 66. Ask him if he knows the Muffin Man. 67. When he says "No." Act genuinely surprised and say "I heard Harry Potter does." 68. Play knock and run at his bedroom door for hours in the middle of the night. 69. Offer him ice-cream cake. 70. Make him watch "Legally Blonde." 71. Buy him a gerbil. 72. Cry when he kills the gerbil. Loudly. For hours. 73. Buy another gerbil.


	3. Chapter 3

**This one is for Draco Malfoy. I sadly do not the Harry Potter series Lol! **1. Follow him around, singing "The Sun Will Come Out Tomorrow."

2. Then, give him a nice hug, and tell him that you'll bring him a bottle of tanning lotion tomorrow. Meanwhile, you recommend the tanning beds in Diagon Alley.

3. Have every Muggle-Born in Hogwarts follow him.

4. Ask him if you can go to his and Harry's wedding.

5. Tell him that Hermione and Ron want to come, too.

6. When he screams "Me and Potter aren't getting married!" Say, "Oh right, you and Pansy are. Silly me!"

7. Draw him a picture of what his and Pansy's kid will look like.

8. Train a ferret to follow him.

9. Pants him in the middle of the Great Hall.

10. Once you do that, ask him why his boxers are red and gold and say "I LOVE Harry Potter!" on them.

11. Ask him if he knows what the sun is.

12. Ask him if his dad has gone bankrupt yet, (Do this every morning)

13. Walk into the classes you have with him wearing a "Malfoy Stinks" badge. Make sure your group is with you.

14. But red and gold dye into his hair gel.

15. Pretend like you are going to kiss him. When he almost touches your lips moan "Oh Harry"

16. Poke him in class. Enough to get you both in detention.

17. Poke him even more in detention.

18. When he walks by, pull him into a closet and turn the lights on. Then say "Shoot! I thought you were Harry!"

19. Buy him ferret treats.

20. Post his baby pictures all over the school.

21. Imperious him into singing "I kissed a Muggle-born and I liked it"


End file.
